Letting Go… The Art of Detachment
“We cannot begin to work on ourselves, to live our own lives, feel our own feelings, and solve our own problems until we have detached…” – Melody Beattie
Detachment is a significant topic because it is a first step in taking care of ourselves.
However, detachment may seem like a negative behavior. That is, people often
confuse detachment with not caring, with being cold and withdrawn, or with
removing love and affection. Quite the contrary, detachment does involve love and
caring; love and caring for yourself without getting over-involved in other’s lives.
Here are some ideas of what is involved with the detachment process:
Self-responsibility; letting others live their own lives
Living in the present; instead of trying to control the future
Acceptance of reality and a release of our burdens
Setting appropriate and much needed boundaries in our relationships
With detachment comes a sense of peace and serenity. Freedom is another benefit of
detachment; a freedom from other’s problems as well as a freedom to focus on our
Remember, “detachment is not detaching from the person whom we care about, but
from the agony of involvement” – Al-Anon member.